Donald Trump’s New Adviser Bernie Sanders Adds Credibility to Campaign

Donald Trump just made a speech on CNN condemning the terrible violence at his campaign rallies with his new speech writer standing behind him smiling. From the speech:

This article is from the parody section, as if you can’t tell.

Our campaign does not believe and never will encourage anybody to disrupt anything. We have millions of supporters, people do what they do. People have the right to protest. I happen not to believe that people should disrupt anybody’s meetings.

I will not pay the legal costs of an individual who sucker-punched somebody. To my supporters, I say that violence is not acceptable in the American political process.

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PUBLIC REACTION

Newscast Now attended a gathering Trump Train rally to see how the violent racist thugs and the heinous communists were reacting to this new alliance. “I don’t think it’s real,” said an orange-haired high school boy with glasses. “I think that Newscast Now photoshopped another picture.” A tall lanky man then followed, “Isn’t that Chris Christie’s clothes and body? Bernie doesn’t look like that.” The school boy added, “Bernie’s face looks too clear. That’s fake. We’ve been cucked.”

A short woman pushed her head up to reach the microphone and exclaimed, “Of course it’s real. It’s right here on the news website. They wouldn’t make that up!”

The tall man replied, “Look. Look at that! Bernie’s face doesn’t match. It’s sharper. Do the research. This photo is fake.”

The woman became angry jumping up and down and yelling, “Is not! Bernie’s just thinking clearly. Donald’s thinks fuzzy. You can tell that by the picture.” The woman continued, “You’re all crazy. I gotta go to the bathroom, then I’m off to cash my check from George Soros. I’m voting for Hillary.”

Another woman piped in, ” All they had on Trump was his big mouth. That’s gone. Ted Cruz is out of this. Now what are they gonna do?”

A man in a suit replied, “They’ll probably make up a fake story where The Donald and Bernie formed an alliance, then they’ll discredit both.” Looks of disbelief were everywhere. “No, really. It could happen.”

Picture credits: Donald, Bernie.